Hazel Rolston: June 2008 Archives

A moment of frivolity!

By
Hazel Rolston
on June 25, 2008 5:50 PM | | Comments (1) | TrackBacks (0)
The trouble with being a Christian writer is that it comes with expectations. Expectations of myself, i.e "am I measuring up to who I should be as a child of God and as one who has committed her journey to the written word?"Coupled with those of others, "is she who I expect her to be, since I have bought her book and she claims to follow God?" Finally add in the expectations of God, as said through the words of Jesus: "If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me." Luke 9:23 (New International Version)
Is it any wonder I come to my blog with fear and trepidation of how much of my real self I should reveal as I fear I live up to none of these expectations. However today I just want to confess that I am a fickle, trite individual who is capable of a moment of frivolity, as well as someone who deeply wants to connect with God and share the hope of my faith: Despite having not received any royalties yet, I have probably just blown the next three years worth (I jest, I hope sales won't be that bad) on a.... maxi dress and not on a new high tech Biblical concordance I as fear I should! Yes the long flowing dress with elaborate bodice (that is designed for the elegant willowy figure, rather than my pear shaped one!!) was half price and I succumbed to the excuse that my brother is soon to be married and that I would like a really stunning outfit for his big day.
I am still not sure how God has viewed this impetus act, but I don't think that he wants us to be miserable and never able to step out and enjoy a moment of madness! (I will let you know if He tells me otherwise). In the meantime I have decided to pretty much be myself in this blog, after all what's the point in pretending to be someone else when the one person I want to impress already knows who I am!

Steps that led to a brighter place.

By
Hazel Rolston
on June 3, 2008 7:13 PM | | Comments (2) | TrackBacks (0)
I am now back in Bristol following a week in 'Norn Iron.' It was absolutely lovely to meet old &  new friends through the events'. Thank-you so much for support and I really hope that something I said or that you have since read has been helpful to you or your loved one.

Recently it has really struck me how many different people are affected by post-natal depression, as I not only spoke to women with post-natal depression but also concerned supporters such as husbands, brothers, aunts and neighbours. Most folk are keen to know what helped me out of my wild place. Thus this week's blog is a wee synopsis of some of the steps that, as discussed in my book, led me to a brighter place.

  • Continuing to practice my faith, through praying, attending Church and a mums' group, helped me to maintain Christian hope & resist the lure of Despair, (even though at times I felt as if God and his people had abandoned me).
  • Medication and professional help. Finding the right medication and a good psychiatrist were a really important part of my recovery, but even the initial not-so-brilliant treatments helped release me from my 'crater'.
  • Practical and Emotional support from family and friends, e.g. help to clean my house, support to look after Katherine when I attended appointments or a compassionate listening ear at the end of a phone all gave me strength to take vital steps out of my depression.
  • Taking small risks when able, e.g. going to the supermarket, meeting up with friends for short periods, taking a daily rest, all led me to recover so that I could take bigger steps e.g. facing my fears in counseling, learning new skills to challenge negative thinking through cognitive behavioural therapy and attending a british sign language class. All of these helped me to renew my confidence, feel more hopeful and thus climb out of my depression.
A couple of extras steps, (not in the book);
  • A morning shower. During my depression coincidently we got a new shower and I discovered that if I had a drenched myself with warm water every morning it helped me feel a little better. Often I prayed that as the water covered me that the Holy Spirit would also cover and protect me.
  • Going to the cinema alone! Some evenings I felt so awful that I just needed to spontaneously escape from my mental captors (whose voices seemed louder when I was at home in the evening) so when Steve returned from work I set off to the cinema alone! I found a large cinema screen demanded my attention and a girly film helped me cry. Because I found it hard to predict my desperate feelings, often my need to get out did not coincide with others availability and I became comfortable with only my personal selection of sugary 'Pic & Mix' in hand!
Maybe you would like to share what steps have led you through your depression to a brighter place? If so I, and I am sure many others, would be thrilled to read your comments.

« Hazel Rolston: May 2008 | Archives | Hazel Rolston: July 2008 »

Search this site

About this Archive

This page is a archive of recent entries written by Hazel Rolston in June 2008.

Hazel Rolston: May 2008 is the previous archive.

Hazel Rolston: July 2008 is the next archive.